TLZone Forums banner

1 - 20 of 23 Posts

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
11,457 Posts
Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
Father's Day writing.

Sunday, June 17th was Father’s Day. It is the first Father’s Day that I did not have a father to wish Happy Father’s Day to. I would love to have said those words once more to my dad. I would have loved to have said “I love you dad”. Dad would have looked at me and smiled a soft, warming, gentle smile, one of delight and content, as he would reply “Son you did not have to do that” “Ah shucks dad, it’s not much, take mom out and have dinner on me” I would happily exclaim, “pick up you something as well. This is your day dad, have fun and enjoy”.

On this day my mind was preoccupied a little because of work I had to do. With each hour of the day it dragged by oh so slow. I was dragging, working on this day. As I sit with my family this Father’s Day who met me for lunch, I realized this Father’s Day I don’t have dear ole dad. My three children gave me gifts they made. As tears filled my eyes I could not help to think what I would have given “my dad “on this special day. Would it have been money, a gift card, dinner, or something more?

My mind races with possibilities as my youngest loudly and repeatedly called out. “Daddy, Happy Father’s Day, Daddy, Happy Father’s Day, Daddy, Happy Father’s day”. My oldest two children would chime in as well. “Happy Father’s Day”. I snap back to reality and smiled, I gave them big hugs and kisses to each one of them and thanked them for remembering dear ole dad. I did not care they may have been a bit loud, perhaps others did, but right now it did not matter to me for my children were wishing me a great day. The time was filled with joy but even still I longed to say those words as well. I think of dad everyday but on this day I thought of him even more as I think I should.

I have no idea if our loved ones hear you or not in the ever after, but as I stood by dad’s resting place and quietly said: “I miss you dad, I love you dad, Happy Father’s day”. As the birds chirp in the background, as the sun sets against the recent storm clouds across the mountains I take comfort that perhaps dear ole dad is looking at me with a soft, warm, gentle smile saying that’s my boy. Happy Father’s Day son. I cannot see the expression on his face but I can remember his smile, the voice of years passed that will never fade away. Those memories will carry me through, no matter what. Today, Father’s Day, I believe my dad knew I was thinking of him and wishing him a great day.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,690 Posts
My dad moved-on in his plane crash when i was 16 Delt :banghead . I know how ya feel man.

Nicely written :hail
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
11,556 Posts
Well written Del', nicely put :thumbup

I have that strain of thought on Mothers Day every year..................even after 20yrs :(

Del', it will ease with time.....................honestly.
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
24,892 Posts
Very well put Del, thanks for sharing:)
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
240 Posts
Hell, I would have loved to have been able to say those words just once in my life. My mom and pops split when i was real young and in an nasty divorce we moved half way across the country.

He is older and has more kids now. Some times I try to track him down but wonder what on earth would I say. Is it even worth it.
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
24,892 Posts
Hell, I would have loved to have been able to say those words just once in my life. My mom and pops split when i was real young and in an nasty divorce we moved half way across the country.

He is older and has more kids now. Some times I try to track him down but wonder what on earth would I say. Is it even worth it.
Dude, you should do it now - you might not always have that option and it would suck to look back and wish you'd done something when ya had the chance. I dunno about you, but I'd much rather give something a shot and deal with whatever the results might be than to never try:O
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
11,457 Posts
Discussion Starter #9
Thanks guys, I'm doing okay. I just get a bit semtimental once in a well and write stuff.

I'm not any good but it helps me to say it and write it down.

Chris I can't say I understand but why not. It's no different than meeting a total stranger and starting a conversation. I'm with Josh on this one, go for it. You may leave with a better understanding of the events that transpired. I think you owe it to yourself to at least try. Perhaps your dad feels the same way but is just as afraid of what your reaction would be.

He may be waiting for you to do just that.

I can't say I understand as my parents were married 51 years until dad passed. He stood beside mom and us through everything. I hope you try and I hope the reception is as warm as the effort put forth. :cheers
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
11,556 Posts
Chris, I kind of side with the other guys? But I think you have to want to do it and not just because you feel you have to ?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
11,556 Posts
Hell, my typo's are getting worse..sorry :blush
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
24,892 Posts
I fixed it I think:)
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,337 Posts
I'm with them too Chris. My Dad was in a similar situation with my sister. He was in college when my sister was concieved. He was told to stay out of their lives and basically thats what he did. I know he always thought about her and always talked about her to my brother and I. He died before he ever got a chance to meet her. He was affraid that she wouldn't accept him and never followed through with his hopes of meeting her. He knew he made some mistakes with this situation, but now it's too late to change anything. I met her about 10 years ago and it's like we always knew each other!

Go find him!!!!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
240 Posts
OK OK. I took your advice. I pulled up a people find on line and paid like 50 bucks in the hopes that it was the right guy.

It looks like I got lukcy. I found the right name age and location. The report gave me addresses and numbers. It also gave me relatives of which I remember a few. So it is looking like the right guy.

The report also provided divorce information and both the names match as well as the time frames. It also looks like he got divorced once more.

Now I am going to have to sleep on it and try to figure out how to work up the nerve to call him and what on earth to say.

More to come if it works out.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
11,556 Posts
Er, thanks Josh :)

Chris man, you go for it.................we all hope it goes well :thumbup Ya let us know how it goes, yeah?
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
24,892 Posts
:thumbup Chris! I have a much easier time saying things in writing than verbally - if you find yourself similarly challenged perhaps writing an old fashioned letter would be a good start:O

best of luck with whatever you decide:thumbup
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,982 Posts
Nicely written words Del...gave me a lump in the throat.

Chris, I agree. go do it...if you feel you are ready. Wish you luck
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
240 Posts
Del,

I do not mean to hyjack your thread at all. IT just got me thinking of something I have been thinking of doing for some time.

So with some help from all of you and the internet I found my dad's side of the family and actually got a hold of one of them this evening. It was my Uncle who is now in the resturant distribution business.

With my first attempt I had to leave a message since of the time difference (Texas). I called right back since they listed a secondary number on the answering machine for his work. When I did call back a lady answered the phone. She asked who was calling and all at once my mind went blank. I was thinking how do you explain who this is if I got the wrong number and was way off base or if they knew who it was and just did not want to talk with me.

My initial message went like this. I am looking for blah blah actually your brother blah blah. My name is blah blah blah, if you reconize the name than you know why I am calling. From there I hung up and called back to get the office number.

So up to date she asks who is calling and I try to figure out how to explain 30 years in 5 seconds or less. All I could get out was I just left a message 2 seconds ago and than she stopped listening and all I heard was "It's him". I was expecting a click but, it was quite and than a man got on the phone and said who is this and I said it's Tarl to which he tested me with what did you say and I had to explain it's Tarl, like Carl but with a T; to which he jumped in and recited my entire name.

From there we spent the next 35 minutes catching up on the fly. I found out I have one Uncle and two Aunts. One of which I had forgotten all about.

I also learned that I had two sisters that I never knew about. My father is closer to me than Texas he is now in SC. I did not get his contact info yet. I figured I would start with this relationship and see if he is interested in talking with me. I did leave the call with if any one else wants to talk with me here is all of my contact information.

Thank you all for the little push I needed to start the ball.

Del again, sorry for taking away from your topic but thank you for your help.
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
24,892 Posts
Great news:thumbup
 

·
No Likey No Spiders
Joined
·
6,412 Posts
Wow, got my eyes welling up with both Del & Tarl's posts.

Del - bask in the memories my friend, be grateful that you have them.

Tarl - I wish you all the best in your journey.

I've been in the presence of my father 3 times in my entire life. 2 Overnight camping trips and an entire summer when I was 16.

I'm 39 now and have always been jealous of people who had great relationships with their Dads as it's been a hole in my heart for my entire life.

He wrote a book a few years ago and contacted me with a link of where I could buy a copy - wow, what a guy my dad is!!!
 
1 - 20 of 23 Posts
Top