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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
A beautiful, voluptuous woman went to a gynecologist. The doctor took one look at this woman and all his professionalism went out the window. He immediately told her to undress.

After she had disrobed the doctor began to stroke her thigh. Doing so, he asked her, "Do you know what I'm doing?"

"Yes," she replied, "you're checking for any abrasions or dermatological abnormalities."

"That is right," said the doctor. He then began to fondle her breasts. "Do you know what I'm doing now?" he asked.

"Yes," the woman said, "you're checking for any lumps or breast cancer. "Correct," replied the shady doctor.

Finally, he mounted his patient and started having sexual intercourse with her. He asked, "Do you know what I'm doing now?"

"Yes," she said. "You're getting herpes; which is why I came here in the first place.
 

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Discussion Starter · #2 ·
Tired of getting stuck in slow moving traffic?
Want to have your own lane on the A1/M5/M42?
Simple, tie these balloons to the rear of your car.
Belt it down the M5 (or any other road you wish to drive fast) and
watch other car drivers freak out and simply get out of your way! When
you get stopped by the police, tell them you thought they were real!


 

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:laugh hats off to ya debs :laugh :hail mind you, you really must try harder if you wish to scrape the bottom of the barrel :devious :laugh :laugh :laugh
 

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Three guys are in a doctor's office. One is a drunk, another's a smoker and the third's a gay guy. The doctor tells each of them that, if they induldge in their bad habit one more time, they will die.

Outside they pass a bar. The drunk says, “I don't care if I die, I need a drink.” The drunk goes into the bar takes a drink and, sure enough, he drops dead.

Meanwhile, the smoker and the gay guy are walking along. Then the smoker spots a lit cigarette on the sidewalk. The gay guy looks over and says, “If you bend down to pick that up, we're both dead.”

:laugh :laugh :laugh
 

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Noooooooooooooooooo, she's back
 

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Yeah baby yeah!!!! :laugh :laugh

A man was walking down the street when he noticed his grandpa sitting on the porch, in the rocking chair, with nothing on from the waist down. "Grandpa, what are you doing?" he exclaimed.

The old man looked off in the distance and did not answer him. "Grandpa, what are you doing sitting out here with nothing on below the waist?" he asked again.

The old man slyly looked at him and said, "Well, last week I sat out here with no shirt on, and I got a stiff neck. This was your Grandma's idea!"


:laugh :laugh
 

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Oh shit, it's all your fault Ally.................now look what you've started :coocoo












































Again!
 

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Can't blame Ally....was making you all laugh long before now with my excellent jokes :)
 

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Aaarrggghhhh! I was going to say, "We've missed you, tryker." But I can see that was a bit hasty. :laugh
 

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Aaarrggghhhh! I was going to say, "We've missed you, tryker." But I can see that was a bit hasty. :laugh

It's nice to know you missed me.....:laugh :laugh

A market researcher called at a house and his knock was answered by a young woman with three small children running around her.

He asked her if she minded replying to his questions and when she agreed, he asked her if she knew his company, Cheeseborough-Ponds. When she said no, he mentioned that among their many products was Vaseline and she certainly knew of that product.

When asked if she used it, she answered, ''Yes, we use it when we have sexual intercourse.'' The interviewer was amazed. He said, ''I always ask that question because everyone uses our product and they always say they use it for the child's bicycle chain, or the gate hinge or some other purpose. But, I know that most people really use it for sexual intercourse, they just don't like to say so.

Since you've been so frank, could you tell me exactly how you use it?'' ''We put it on the doorknob to keep the kids out.''

:laugh :laugh
 

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What insect runs away from everything???












A Flea!! :laugh :laugh
 

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:banghead :banghead :banghead
 
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